A lesson in grace

Today while playing with my children in the mall play area, a very unpleasant thing happened. An angry mom yelled at me. She was clearly upset that my oldest daughter had her shoes on. All I could do is say, "thank you." She was already walking away from the play area and she had no further reason to stay and talk with me. She just wanted to make me feel bad, guilty, and ashamed. She probably wanted to feel good about herself by intimidating a total stranger. She was in error, but she didn't stay around to hear my side or to restore peace. Shoes are not allowed if you are playing. But, what she didn't realize is that my oldest daughter was taking care of the baby. My daughter was being a responsible young lady caring for her youngest sibling. She was not playing in the play area. And, she was not climbing on any of the play equipment. This uncomfortable encounter with this mom made me really think about my own behavior. I can be just like crazy-playland-lady. I can easily jump to conclusions and attack people without real cause. I pass judgement based on what I believe is right. Even if I was a little right, or full-on correct, I tend to leave grace out of my confrontations. The result is that for a while I feel sooo good. I feel empowered and clever. But, over time, when I replace love for law, I become self righteous. I look for more ways where I can voice my opinions over others. I see someones sin and I jump all over them. When I don't leave room for love, I don't see God. I only see me. I don't employ forgiveness and understanding. I become selfish and consequently, alone. The result of the encounter with this mom left a heavy cloud of suspicion over the entire play area. All the other parents diverted their eyes from me. Her judgement was contagious. No one felt free to be loving and kind. Evil is a disaster that pulls everyone down. Even though her anger stung and it hurt to be treated so poorly, I am grateful for this women. She made me realize how I need to change. I don't enjoy being on the receiving end of hatred. So, from this day forward, I will do something constructive. The first thing I will do is pray for this mom. The next thing is I will engage in more loving behavior and strive to be more graceful with others. As Christians we should be the bearers of love and righteousness. I was given a gift today. I pray that I may take this lesson and be the woman God has created me to be.

Hey 5K!

I am so pumped! This Saturday, I completed my first 5K in nearly a decade. I have been working out for months and it is paying off. I am losing weight. I am stronger. I have more energy. I am happier. I basically feel better!! My goal is to run the Grand Rapids 1/2 Marathon in October. I have been following a 15 week program designed by Hal Higdon. Part of the program is to run two races, a 5K and a 10K, before the big day. Saturday was my 5K day. I'll be adding one or two more 5K's before my 10K, though. I want to be really prepared for the 1/2 Marathon.

I signed up for the Hey 5K race sponsored by the christian radio station, 88.9 Hey Radio. I loved how the organizer prayed for us before the race. I couldn't think of a better way to begin my racing again than with an organization that spreads the love of Christ. I truly felt God's presence with me! How cool is that?

 I had no idea how I would feel during the 5K race. I was fully confident I would finish, but I wasn't sure how I would run it. It turns out, I did pretty well. I came in at 29:04 (4th in my age division) and 84th place overall (out of 157 participants). I was overjoyed that I actually ran faster than 30 minutes! I would have been happy with 35 minutes. 10 years ago I was running 23 minutes for a 5K, but that will take a few more years of constant running to get to that level again. I'm very proud of my running level now. Heck, I could barely walk 20 minutes a few months ago!

My family was there to cheer me on and I can't tell you how much their support meant to me. I saw my Summer Grace jumping up and down as I came down the home stretch. I ran even faster knowing that I was making her so happy. Her joy was my joy. :) They even came up with a cheer: "Go Mommy, Go!" Very cute!!

It felt so good to get out there and compete again! I love to run and competing in races is a totally joy for me.

Zoey's Birthday and Birth Story!

Today is my fifth child, Zoey's, 1st birthday. A year ago today, Zoey came into my life in pure beauty, grace, and power.

Here is the story of her amazing birth:

((Warning...Very Long & Graphic!! For Birth Story enthusiasts only!))

Any good story has a back story, so I wanted to go back to when I learned I was pregnant.

I finally had my first ovulation since conceiving my forth child, Emily, nearly two years prior. Emily was 15 months old and I was anxious to receive another blessing. I know my body and exactly when I ovulate, so it was no surprise when I took a pregnancy test two weeks after conceiving (one month after my period) to "confirm" the pregnancy. (I love that the dollar store sells pregnancy tests. They are $14 cheaper than the pharmacy and just as accurate as the EPT tests!) Oh, the joy of staring at those two gorgeous pink lines appearing on the test! Confirming (what I already knew) that I am pregnant and no one but God and I knows, is an intoxicating and beautiful thing, indeed! A baby is growing inside me! Oh, the tremendous blessing!! I kept my secret to myself all day and revealed the news to my husband that night. I wrote him a poem on a leaf I cut into a shape of a leaf. It was cheesy, I know, but endearing nonetheless. Chris shared the excitement with me, but unlike me, he is not fond of keeping good news to himself for long. Immediately, Chris was on the phone calling everyone we knew to share our good news. He drives me batty, but I love his enthusiasm.

I really wanted an unassisted birth, and I would even be OK with a homebirth with a Midwife, but my husband was concerned about safety (me, too, but not about birthing unassisted) and he also didn't want to pay extra for a childbirth. I found an OB practice that had a Nurse Midwife, so I set up an appointment. (But, that didn't mean I stopped planning for an unassisted birth...preparation is half the battle!) I learned that my local hospital 5 minutes from my home no longer allows VBAC's, but I was convinced I could make the Dr's and midwife give me what I wanted. I would NEVER have an unnecessary c-section. Ever. My first birth was an unnecessary c-section. The next three were all VBAC's, with one of them being a homebirth. So with my history of successful VBAC's, I assumed that they would find a way to let me have a VBAC. My first appointment was scheduled with a male OB (Not what I wanted, but I was flexible for my first visit.) After going over my history with him and letting him know under no circumstances will I commit to an unnecessary c-section, he gave me only two options. For starters, Midwife's aren't legally allowed to "catch" the baby of a VBAC. Secondly, I would need to monitor the babies growth via ultrasounds and stress-tests during the last trimester (to make sure a big baby wouldn't try to squeeze out a dreadful, "unmovable, genetically small" pelvis..not!). I would also have to schedule an induction two weeks prior my due date (remember, big baby scare?), and then finally agree to an epidural and constant internal fetal monitoring. That way, I would have a anesthesiologist on call, in case I needed surgery. (The reason for the ban on VBAC's...not sufficient staff for VBAC "uterine rupture" emergencies...ugh...if only they followed the advice based on the current research based on the safety practices on VBAC's and childbirth, in general...I'm digressing...) Well, that was NOT acceptable, since it was all idiotic, barbaric, unfounded, dangerous advice and practice. The other option was to continue to see the OB's or Midwife during my first two trimesters, then transfer my care to the larger hospital 45 minutes from my home during my last trimester. I begrudgingly chose to agree with option #2, but meanwhile I found a Homebirth Midwife to interview. Unfortunately, we are not savers so we didn't have $3000 for the Midwife's fee. Even if we did, I hardly doubt my husband would want to pay $3000 for a homebirth when a hospital birth would be 1/3rd of the cost. Even after we learned the Midwife accepted our insurance (we'd be reimbursed 50%) and she would accept monthly payments, Chris was still not on board with the added cost. "After all," he said, "if we needed to transfer to the hospital, we would have a hospital fee, too." Sometimes a husband can't see beyond the cash... There was the option of just showing up in active labor and give birth the way I wanted. After all, legally a hospital cannot force someone to have any medical procedures done to them, including unnecessary surgery. Also, they can't make me go someplace else if I am prove to be "nontransferable." Being in active labor is all it would take to stay put. So, I ended up seeing the local hospital Midwife for the first two trimesters. I transferred my care to an OB at the other hospital, for my last Trimester. (Meanwhile, I also bought a homebirth kit and prepared myself and educated Chris about my plans for an unassisted birth. I joined online groups for unassisted births, and felt confident that this was the way I wanted to give birth.) It just so happened that the OB I saw in my last trimester miscalculated my due date as July 21st, instead of July 7th. I tried to tell them they were wrong, but lucky for me they didn't listen to me because that only gave me more time to gestate freely without fear of being "overdue" if I ever did make it that far.

July 7, 2009 was Zoey's due date and I was still pregnant. This was the longest gestation out of all my children to date and boy did every part of me feel the need to get her out! I was anxious to have her come before my Mother-In-Law was planning to come visit, too. My Mother-In-Law had already booked a flight on July 9th. I foolishly agreed for her to come visit for a month so close to my due date. She really wanted to be here when i went into labor, so she could watch the kids while Chris and I went to the hospital. But, since I was planning a unassisted homebirth, and not telling anyone, that plan would not work for me. Sometimes, I don't know where my mind goes when I am pregnant! So, early in the morning on the 7th, I decided to speed things along. I was contracting irregularly for weeks, so I knew a castor oil/ root beer concoction would most likely put me into labor. I experienced all the normal cramping and loose stools castor oil produces, but it was obvious that it didn't put me in active labor like I had hoped. Normally, after several hours from drinking my castor oil concoctions, I would have be in active labor and at least would have seen bloody mucus or perhaps even some amniotic fluid by then. I had yet to even see my mucus plug, so I was beginning to have my doubts! By evening, I was disappointed that she wasn't born and my resolve was starting to wane. I was experiencing unprecedented seven to ten minute long, semi-uncomfortable contractions that cycled every five to ten minutes that night, so at the least this peaked my interest. I held onto my hope up that maybe she will come in the middle of the night or very early the next morning. I made the best of my evening by watching movies with Chris, walking around the house, and bouncing on my exercise ball. Despite my feeble attempts to sleep, I did dose off in the wee hours of the next day. I woke up from my phantom sleep a few hours later, to the pull of strong contractions. I couldn't handle lying there, doing nothing but thinking about the pain, so I got up. I sat in a warm bath, but after soaking for about 15 minutes I was compelled to get out since the contractions were getting more uncomfortable. I walked, prayed ("please make this baby come!"), and rocked on the exercise ball, while "listening" to my body. An hour or so later, I finally had "the"contraction which alarmed me. I knelt next to the bed to breathe, moan, then moan loudly through a series of very painful and long contractions. I was starting to really freak out and I was almost crying. I wasn't in a lot of pain. I was mostly in shock at the rapid frequency of the contractions and the way I was dealing with them. I woke Chris up and as soon as he was by my side I felt better. His soothing words, strong hands, and positive energy was all I needed. I laughed at myself for being so freaked out. I knew this was just the beginning of active labor and I needed to mentally prepare for many more hours of labor. I had a couple more strong contractions; one while sitting on the toilet, one standing in front of my bathroom sink, and another next to the crib. Then all of a sudden things took a dramatic change. While standing next to the crib, I had an uncontrollable urge to push...so I did, grunting and all! I reached up to feel a hard head on my perineum. Until then, there still wasn't any bloody show, so I was taken a back. Of course, I excused that from my mind and suddenly realized that not only was I in active labor, but Zoey was about to be born! I exclaimed to Chris that she was coming, NOW! I went straight down on the floor onto my hands and knees, where we laid down a shower curtain covered with bath towels, and immediately started to push her out. I yelled, "she's coming!" and Chris was very reassuring and encouraged me to just let her come. I didn't pause pushing between contractions, like I should have, and just bared down and she was born in one push. (I power-pushed her out too fast because, 1) It hurt, and 2) My memory of Summer's birth came into my present memory and I wanted to avoid a shoulder dystocia.) Chris was prepared and talked me through what he saw; "It's her head," "keep pushing," "she's almost out!" He supported her body and just like that, she was born! Zoey was completely enclosed in her bag of waters as she came into the world. (It is considered a blessing and a sign of wisdom to be "born in the caul.") He gently removed the bag off her face and water gushed everywhere. He unwrapped her umbilical cord twice from around her neck. (It wasn't tightly wound to cause alarm, but wound twice was worth noting!) I quickly turned and sat on my bottom to receive Zoey into my arms. Her energy was powerful and intoxicating. She rested quietly, eyes tightly shut, and didn't make a peep. She was breathing beautifully and was pink as a rose. After 20 minutes, I felt a strong desire to push out her placenta, and out it came intact and without incident. I wasn't bleeding heavily and I was already having all the normal afterbirth contractions. Chris woke up our oldest child, Brianna, and gave her the honor of cutting Zoey's cord. All the other children quietly came into the bedroom to welcome their new baby sister with kisses and much love. Her birth from the time I "woke up" with those painful contractions till her birth was about 45 minutes. She was born at 4:45am, 7-8-9 (Cool date, huh?) She weighed 8lbs 14oz and was 21in long. After a couple hours, we noticed that my bleeding hadn't completely stopped and we were concerned that I tore and that maybe I should go to the hospital to get stitched. So, we called up a friend to come over and watch the kids while we all went to the hospital  We told the hospital staff that she was an "oops, baby." (Admitting to a unassisted homebirth would have made them all go bat-shit-crazy.) I allowed Zoey to also be admitted, but she was never separated from me. They just looked her over and gave her a full bill of health. We were lectured for not giving her the Hep b immunization and refusal of the vitamin K shot, though. (sigh, roll eyes) Once we checked into the ER, they examined me and soon I was sent up to the Birthing Unit. I assumed since I just had a baby and I tore my perineum which was still bleeding, I would see a OB right away. Not so. I waited for five hours in the postpartum room before the Dr. came to stitch me. My tear wasn't bleeding, after all. It already clotted and the bleeding I had was just the normal afterbirth blood. Originally, they hooked me up to a IV, where I was given pitocin (standard procedure in helping the uterus clamp down...not really unnecessary, but I didn't object since I didn't want to seem even more strange.) I now realize that I was never in any danger at home and the bleeding did eventually slow and the tear would have just healed naturally. It was quite painful to get stitched. Actually, it was the 5 shots to my perineum and vagina which caused me to cry and shake all over. It is always an exhausting ordeal to stay in the hospital, not horrible, but just stressful and unnecessary. On the plus side, I got to weigh and measure Zoey! She also got a proper umbilical clamp and an extra hat and onsie shirt. I didn't take dare put on the clamp I had from my birth kit. They would have known right away that we purposely had her at home and I'm positive they would have treated us much, much differently. Someone else change my sheets for me & was able to watch cable TV! I also got those amazing mesh panties and jumbo pads, plus a couple dozen newborn pampers and a package of wipes for Zoey! I also got one of those hideous diaper bags supplied from a formula company, filled with various coupons and free formula. They also supplied me Tux pads, Dermoplast, a script for stool softeners, 800mg Ibuprofen, and Vicodin! Everything worked out well, and I was happy to be home the next morning.

My Day Out

Yesterday was my "day out." After dropping Chris off at church, I headed to Brianna's school to bring her something she forgot. Lucky for her that I wanted to drive all over town today! After visiting with Brianna and her classmates for a while, I decided to surprise Chris at church and bring him lunch so he can eat with the girls and I. Emily was typically talkative. She was trying to make new friends with a sweet older gentleman. She excitedly informed him that she had a "boo-boo." Well, he mistook her for saying, "I have a poo-poo." He was wondering why she was lifting her knee towards him? I wonder what he expected her to lift towards him instead? I digress... Anyway, when I politely informed him that she did not have a "poo poo," rather she wanted him to notice her scraped knee, aka: "boo boo," he laughed and laughed, and tried not to choke on his lunch. Ahhh, Emily. :)

We went home for Emily's nap. I decidedly chose to not do any chores and instead, updated our financial spreadsheets. Soon I was off again to pick up the other kiddos from school. We went straight to the library from there. We had exactly one hour before closing. Summer found a over sized princess embellished with jewels.  Emily found a Dora book which she clutched onto. Paul found a half a dozen Star Wars books. Brianna collected a variety of books. I grabbed a bunch of easy reading books to read out loud to Summer and Emily. I also picked out a few children's literature for myself. (I LOVE children's literature, by the way!) Before closing, we dashed downstairs to the adult section to pick up a book I placed on hold. It was good to be in the library once again. Lots of fun! In case you are wondering, my children are super wonderful at the library. They are respectful, quiet (Emily is a bit loud time to time, but she is corrected well), and a joy to the patrons and staff. The librarians LOVE my kids. They always comment on how kind and obedient they are. Trust me, my kids are the exception, not the norm. You know, I will write more about why my children are a joy to be around in another blog entry, but for now I will only say that godly parenting is easy and the rewards are plentiful!

The day ended with a yummy bean soup (Yay for crock pots that can feed your family four straight days!) and chocolate chip ice cream.

On a bummer note, Zoey is sick again. Boo. And Emily looks like she is getting sick too. Time for zinc, vitamin C, and goldenseal!!

Stir Crazy

Due to Emily's freeky rash and Zoey's pink eye this month, I have been secluding myself from the world and the effect is now beginning to wear on me. I am usually more of a homebody, but I typically do get out of my house at least once a week. Moms should definitely not stay in their homes for a month! We need interaction with other humans outside the confinements of our own walls. So do my children. I did manage to go to church this Sunday, but church is more of a social nightmare for me, so that really doesn't count. I need parks, libraries, museums, friends' homes, and store shopping (without buying junk!). All of the library books are now overdue, I have missed two playgroups, and I haven't had any friends over. So, tomorrow I am getting out!! The excitement is overwhelming!

Girl Scout fun-ness

My oldest daughter is a Girl Scout. This was her first year and she was so happy to participate in it. She is a "Junior". Girls Scouts have six age levels: Daisy, Brownie, and Junior, Cadette, Senior, and Ambassador. Every other week during this school year she joined her friends and fellow Girl Scouts for fun and fellowship. In addition to the meetings which they made crafts, ate food, and giggled non-stop, she also participated in community gatherings. She also sang songs for nursing home residents, learned about different cultures, wrote stories, sold a billion cookies, and went to camp. It was a great first year in Girl Scouts! Today was the Bridging Ceremony and the awarding of badges. Girl Scouts move or "bridge" to the next level at the end of the school year. The entire troop and their families were there to support and participate in the festivities. I was so happy for Brianna. She received a green ribbon and a pin. She was so happy and proud. All the girls that were bridging crossed a little bridge and received a badge and a flower. Brianna didn't bridge, but it was fun to watch the other little girls celebrate their moving forward.

It is HOT!

Yay! Today I got out the kiddy pool and turned on the sprinklers for the kiddos. The three oldest bounded outside in their last-year's, too tight, worn out swimsuits to enjoy a few hours of this hot, hot day in the sprinklers. It is in the 80's with a touch of humidity. It feels goooood. Days like these are what gets me through the winter. I look forward to this day during the middle of February. "Just wait, Susie, the sun and warmth will be here soon..." Well, it isn't that soon, but it came and I wish it would not go away. Thank you God for today. You ROCK!!

Happy Mother's Day!

Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one's youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; They will not be ashamed when they speak with their enemies in the gate. Ps 127:3-5

My children are the sweetest gift of Heaven to Earth.

Mother's Day couldn't start early enough for my children, so they started celebrating it yesterday. They were all singing, bounding, and brightening up the day with their joyful praises of their love for their mommy. It was quite a day! Yesterday, the gifts began pouring in. I received loads of hand written cards with hearts and rainbows. The messages say how much I am loved. The happy mom and child pictures were the endearing, cute stick figures with arms outstretched and twenty fingers. I even was given a small bite of chocolate from Summer's chocolate candy. Paul gave me a potted Pansie flower and a gorgeous card with a painted blue flower. He used painted leaves to make the pedals. So creative! Brianna made me a picture with dried, pressed flowers and a lovely stamped message that says "Happy Mother's Day!" She framed it, too! Summer made me a flower bouquet out of paper and straws. The flowers were paper cut-outs of her hands. Oh, the happy joys of a being a mom! My children restore joy in me by their merriment, goodness, and purity.

Life is truly grand for me.

This is how I learn the way of thanksgiving.

Happy Mother's Day!

Flower browsing

I just love my kids. Today I stopped by Walmart to buy Paul's birthday party invitations. We like to call our little shopping excursions, "adventures." On our "adventures" to the store, we like to point out fun things, giggle,  hold hands, and discover excitement down each isle. Like always, today we entered the store through the Nursery entrance. We always like to come into Walmart this way. I guess it is the smell of fertilizers, plants and flowers, the openness, the variety of tools, the sprinklers, the ceramic bunnies and bird baths, grills, and outside lawn and seating sets. It speaks happiness and wonderment. So, today, we spent time admiring all the beautiful flowers, plants, saplings, and vegetables. I gave my children a little time to dash in and out of the rows. They giggle and rush past the rows of growing-treasures playing hide and seek. Then, we slowly walk down each row together, admiring all the different species of plants. "Ooh, smell this flower, mommy!"  "Look at this pretty rose (not really a rose, but that's OK)!" "Let's pretend we are in Alice In Wonderland!" "Blueberry bushes!" "Raspberry bushes!" I show them my favorite flower, alyssum. It is a lovely cluster of tiny white flowers that smell delicious. After lingering there for a little while we finally go tend to our shopping. I decided tomorrow we will come back and pick out our favorite plants to plant in our yard this weekend. I can't wait to surprise them!

A great quote

"Our burdens are here, our road is before us, and the longing for goodness and happiness is the guide that leads us through many troubles and mistakes to the peace which is true Celestial City." The Little Women

Cleaning Windows

I discovered a new love today: cleaning the living room windows! I did not realize how much I took for granted the view through a clean window. Over a period of days, weeks, and months I became accustomed to the accumulating dirt and grime that slowly coated the windows and screens. Then, today, I wiped away all the signs of the dirt and then it hit me. This stupid, mindless chore gave me such an amazing dose of peace! I realized that seeing clearly is intoxicating, beautiful, and restful. The accumulating dirt and grime comes silently and steals away the beauty. It creates diversion from true sight. We can almost see..but it isn't perfect. Somehow, I do this to myself repetitively. I slowly allow my life to get filled with all sorts of dirt and grime: jealous, bitterness, pride, fear,  loneliness, and many forms of idolatry. I am restless and unable to manage the pressure of all the stress and hardship. Then, simply, I am once again reminded of my true self. I experience the process of  getting cleaned again. It is not me doing the cleaning, though. It is the miracle grace of my Savior that removes all the hindrances and restores me to my true gorgeous and magnificent form I was created to be! I am His. He perfects me, renews me, and purify all my iniquities and deficiencies. And he does this for me! Hourly, daily, weekly, and year after year. Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus...

This was my day

My day started with Zoey waking up 5am to nurse and snuggle in bed with me. Within an hour I had a couple more kids join us in the bed for a morning snuggle. As soon as I was up and stumbling around to help with the older kids get off to school, it was then I realized that Emily needed to see a doctor, like yesterday. It was 8:30am and I was scrambling to get my two year old into the doctors office. Emily has a terrible rash all over her body. I don't know what to think about her rash. Google was beginning to make me paranoid! Allergies? Measles? Infection? I was able to obtain a 9:45am appointment. Chris met us there at 10:15 (yes, he got lost, again!). The doc said she has a strep rash. She didn't swab Emily's throat to get a real diagnosis of strep because my poor child was F-R-E-A-K-I-N-G out!! Back story: Two months ago, poor Emily busted her lip open and had to go the the ER and get five stitches. They had to strap her in a medieval-type contraption in order to sew her lip. Needless to say, the doctor's office scares her to pieces. When the nurse came into the examing room get her temperature today, it may have well been a knife the way Emily screamed in terror. (The nurse was also not very nice.) Chris and the doctor (luckily, doc was nice) had to hold her down just to look in her ears. Poor Emily! The doc sent us home with a script for antibiotics and instructed us to give her benadryl for the rash. By the way, I googled strep rash and that is when I discovered that strep rash is Scarlet Fever. What??? Luckily, with antibiotics, the strep won't turn into it's killer, Rheumatic fever. But, still, I don't really think that diagnosis was right. She never had a fever and she wasn't cultured for strep, so I have doubts. I'm hopeful the antibiotics will help, so I dropped the script off at Meijers and went home to feed the girls lunch. (By the way, antibiotics are FREE at Meijers!) After lunch, I returned a phone call to a credit specialist who is helping us get a lower interest rate on a home re-fi loan. (Yay, Dave Ramsey!!) Weeeellll, I was informed that Chris' credit score has been hijacked by an evil person. Chris is a victim of identity threat and his credit is shot! You see, last year Chris' wallet was stolen. This slime-bag, low-life managed to sign up for Comcast cable under Chris' name and rack up a huge unpaid bill, which was then reported on Chris' credit report. I decided to go to the local Comcast office and pick up paperwork for identity theft. That place was creepy. It felt like a waiting room at a jail. I have no idea if jails have waiting rooms, but if they do, Comcast has got the right idea. My girls were a sweet distraction and we managed to play little guessing games while we waited. After 20 minutes of waiting in a short line, I finally got the paper work to begin the arduous task of clearing my husbands' name and getting his credit score back up. After that fun adventure, I drove to the bank and once again landed myself in a long wait. Just my luck that the car in front of me at the drive-up ATM was a ATM technician. Finally, I got my money, picked up the medicine from the store, got gas, then headed home just in time for Emily's nap...which she never took. Grrreeaat. We read books, instead, so it wasn't all that bad. Soon, we were in the car again to pick up the older two from school and Emily took her nap. Once we were on our way back home, I thought it would be fun to treat the kids (and me) to Frosty Oasis. We each got a swirl soft-serve ice cream cone. We walked around and licked our ice cream while the 75 degree weather melted it down our hands and onto our clothes. It was heaven. I cleaned up everyone with water from my stainless steel water bottle and we headed back home. The kids played outside and worked on their homework while I paid some bills online and juggled a baby on my knee. Brianna made a fort on the swing set and I was invited to steal a moment of peace with her before dinner. We dreamt of living in a fort in the trees in some far-off land. We had lots of marvelous ideas of how we would pull it off. After dinner, I was hit again with full-blown stress: Paul has rash now, too. Duh! I saw his face this morning, but I shrugged it off to be his eczema flaring up. I never noticed his chest or back because I hadn't seen him without a shirt on all day. I panicked. It was 7pm. I called the on-call doc and tried my best not reveal my true level of  freak-out. Doc #2 was not at all convinced that Emily has strep rash. He explained how the rash is not the correct texture. Apparently strep rash feels like sand paper. My kids rashes are smooth. Soooo, he suggests no antibiotics and that we should just wait and see. It is a virus, according to Dr #2. It isn't contagious once the rash appears. I still have doubts, but I feel better. It is 8pm. Bedtime for the kids. Zoey got back up at 8:30pm screaming. Lovely. She nursed and fell right back to sleep. Chris made it home around 9pm. I finally finished my dinner. We talked a bit, then watched our Netflix movie, Gran Torino. After the movie, I scooped out some of the chocolate cookie dough I made yesterday and made a batch of cookies. It is 11:30pm and the loud thunder storm woke up Zoey and she is ready to party. Now Summer woke up. I gave her a cookie. Zoey climbed over the dog and bunked her head. She is now being comforted and nursed back to sleep. Summer headed back to bed. The storm is over but the day isn't done. THE END! Goodnight!

My thearapy session in the basement

Cleaning my basement that was being to look like an episode from Hoarders was more meaningful than a therapist session. Once I started separating and sorting through the enormous piles, I ended up with a wonderful space. My accomplishments? I filled about 10 large garbage bags, plus broken down boxes. I have a car full pile of things to drop off at the thrift store. Now the garage is full of stuff for the garage sale I intend to have next month. The rest of the stuff was organized in containers, labelled, and neatly arranged on the shelves. It was good, hard work and so satisfying to my soul.

The Best Me I Can Be

I want this blog to inspire and mildly entertain your curious minds. I have been journaling forever, but all my real juicy stuff will never get posted and will need to stay in the notebook binder where they belong. I hope to write something interesting. I also hope you don't mind too terribly if I bore or annoy you. I'm not a character in a book, so my life can be just as dull as yours. In any event, thanks for reading.